Chit Chat

Eight Years!

Today marks our eighth wedding anniversary!

In eight years, we’ve…

…moved across the country twice

…lived in three apartments and one house

…changed jobs many times

…faced surgeries, hospitalizations, and other health troubles

…put together many pieces of Ikea furniture

…made lots of firstime grown-up decisions together

…brought Amelia home and started our parenthood journey

That last one may be our biggest adventure yet… and the reason our eighth year of marriage has been the best yet.

It’s a tradition to share the passages that our dear friends and family read aloud during our ceremony, so here they are again! The passage by Robert Fulgham is especially sweet this year because a friend had the same one included in her vows at the wedding we attended a few weeks ago. It reminded me how much I love it!

“Love is a Temporary Madness,” Louis de Bernieres

Love is a temporary madness; it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of eternal passion. That is just being in love, which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Those that truly love have roots that grow towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossoms have fallen from their branches, they find that they are one tree and not two.

Excerpt from “Union,” Robert Fulgham

“You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes to this moment of yes, you have been making promises and agreements in an informal way.

All those conversations that were held riding in a car or over a meal or during long walks, all those sentences that began with “When we’re married” and continued with “I will and you will and we will.”  Those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe” and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding.

The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “You know all those things we’ve promised and hoped and dreamed—well, I meant it all, every word.”

Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another: acquaintance, friend, companion, dancing partner, and even teacher, for you have learned much from one another in these last few years.

Now you shall say a few words that take you across a threshold of life, and things will never quite be the same between you. For after these vows, you shall say to the world: this—is my husband, this—is my wife.”

“Love,” by Roy Croft

I love you
Not only for what you are,
But for what I am
When I am with you.

I love you,
Not only for what
You have made of yourself,
But for what
You are making of me.

I love you
For the part of me
That you bring out;

I love you
For putting your hand
Into my heaped-up heart
And passing over
All the foolish, weak things
That you can’t help
Dimly seeing there,

And for drawing out
Into the light
All the beautiful belongings
That no one else had looked
Quite far enough to find

I love you because you
Are helping me to make
Of the lumber of my life
Not a tavern
But a temple.

Out of the works
Of my every day
Not a reproach
But a song.

I love you
Because you have done
More than any creed
Could have done
To make me good.
And more than any fate
Could have done
To make me happy.

You have done it
Without a touch,
Without a word,
Without a sign.

You have done it
By being yourself.

Another heartfelt thank you to all the friends and family who made our wedding day such a happy event!

 

I’m thankful we’ve been together through it all, even (or especially) for the low moments, because the highs are that much sweeter.

Cheers to another year!

 

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